Thank you for letting us into the real story behind the words. Your journey back to connection — back to yourself — is such a tender reminder that the only growth worth chasing is the kind that comes from vulnerability and truth.
Your writing feels like a deep breath… an invitation to slow down, listen for what’s real, and savor those small exchanges that nourish us from the inside out. I’m moved by your courage to show up with your whole heart — that honesty is the real gift here.
Write for yourself, and your people will find you. They already are. Keep following the spark that brought you here — curiosity, honesty, and the desire to connect in ways that truly matter.
Thank you for this. I would be lying if I didn't say, I think about quitting every single day, but I keep coming back because showing up feels better than hiding.
That comment makes me laugh! Can’t tell you how many times I’ve written the question, “Shall I stop writing?” in my journal before I fall asleep. I’m not sure exactly why, but each morning I wake up wanting to write again.
This chance to write my truth and own it publicly is such a privilege. This is one of the most healing journeys of my life.
Like you, sometimes I find myself getting caught up in the numbers. When I awaken, I realize that my own growth is enough. If others find value in my work, that’s wonderful. If they don’t, that’s ok too.
I love the realness of this and it’s such a beautiful reminder for me too. Remembering why we started in the first place is so important. I was reflecting on this as well. That vulnerability and connection. Piece is so important. I feel like I should put that on a sticky note somewhere so I never forget that.
Omg, you are speaking truth. I usually lose them, too. I can’t add another note to my Apple notes app either. I guess mental notes will have to do for now, haha 🤣
I also was told I needed a social media following. I don't because I decided that I wanted to self publish and my writing is really acting as a healing for me. And...the serotonin boost is addictive. I find it working against my goals. So I try to put the phone down and breathe and remind myself that what will be will be.
Thank you for writing your article. I think it is so easy to move to what will make money that as a therapist i forget to write from a passion. your article is a great reminder.
This is the kind of confession that deserves both a standing ovation and a group hug from everyone still refreshing their Substack stats like it’s the NASDAQ. You didn’t just stop chasing numbers; you tackled the algorithm, looked it in the eye, and said, “Not today, robot overlord.”
It’s funny, isn’t it? Substack was supposed to be a cozy little writer’s campfire, but somehow we all turned it into an episode of Shark Tank. We came here to tell stories, then started pitching ourselves to the algorithm like it’s a moody executive with commitment issues.
Your piece slices through that madness. You remind us that dopamine is cheap, but connection is the good stuff. That hit when a stranger says, “I thought I was the only one”—that’s better than any spike in followers.
You called out the mask, the performance, the desperate need to be seen, and you did it with honesty instead of apology. That’s rare. And ending with curiosity instead of clickbait? That’s practically revolutionary.
So here’s to you: the first writer to admit the numbers were never the story. May your metrics fall and your meaning rise. The algorithm can count engagement, but it will never understand grace, sarcasm, or the human heart.
I concur 110% I joined to publish here as the spirit moves me. I've always trusted the universe to be my algorithm - ie as a therapist, let the "good fits" find me. Let the folks who resonate w/my words du jour be in the roulette roll. I've also started looking at some of the "numbers chasers" guides, just to see what they suggest. I don't want to be a mouse in the maze of calculated moves. I start the day looking to see what The Therapist has to say, and, that's because of what she has to say, and she also notices and responds in kind!! Now I click the share to Notes - having no idea what that means, but ideally someone somewhere gains somehow.
Isn’t it strange that no matter how ‘successful’ we are, we always seem to want just that little bit more. And then we beat ourselves up for being caught in the dopamine trap. It’s very human. But I also have to remind myself that some connection — or having some hope of connection — really is better than nothing. I’m always grateful for my tiny thimble of followers (I might have only 5 reads of a note!) and for having the opportunity of getting a few of my thoughts in my Substack ‘scrapbook’, it’s what I enjoy and that’s what matters. Ive enjoyed reading your reflections too, so thank you for sharing your honesty… it’s a really brave thing to do.😍
This is so true and I totally relate to it. Trying to work out the algorithm stymies creativity and intuition. Writing become stilted with an absence of our energies. Such an important and painful lesson to become aware of. Thank you for such honesty.
It is so easy to. It is validation for who I am and what I write which I didn’t get as a child. So I am making up for it now. And no, it doesn’t serve us at all.
It's so easy for all of us to get off track by the shinny object or the outside validation. Insight and growth are what builds our confidence and peace. No addictive dopamine hit needed. Isn't that just so cool!
Thank you for expressing something that has been needling me as well. In this age of having to “optimize” everything it feels especially yucky to optimize our hearts and souls. Appreciated this discussion. And have really been enjoying your work.
Thank you for letting us into the real story behind the words. Your journey back to connection — back to yourself — is such a tender reminder that the only growth worth chasing is the kind that comes from vulnerability and truth.
Your writing feels like a deep breath… an invitation to slow down, listen for what’s real, and savor those small exchanges that nourish us from the inside out. I’m moved by your courage to show up with your whole heart — that honesty is the real gift here.
Write for yourself, and your people will find you. They already are. Keep following the spark that brought you here — curiosity, honesty, and the desire to connect in ways that truly matter.
Thank you for this. I would be lying if I didn't say, I think about quitting every single day, but I keep coming back because showing up feels better than hiding.
That comment makes me laugh! Can’t tell you how many times I’ve written the question, “Shall I stop writing?” in my journal before I fall asleep. I’m not sure exactly why, but each morning I wake up wanting to write again.
This chance to write my truth and own it publicly is such a privilege. This is one of the most healing journeys of my life.
Like you, sometimes I find myself getting caught up in the numbers. When I awaken, I realize that my own growth is enough. If others find value in my work, that’s wonderful. If they don’t, that’s ok too.
That's absolutely right, but it is something I have to remind myself of daily
I love the realness of this and it’s such a beautiful reminder for me too. Remembering why we started in the first place is so important. I was reflecting on this as well. That vulnerability and connection. Piece is so important. I feel like I should put that on a sticky note somewhere so I never forget that.
Agreed! But I'm pretty certain I'd lose this sticky note in about five minutes😫
Omg, you are speaking truth. I usually lose them, too. I can’t add another note to my Apple notes app either. I guess mental notes will have to do for now, haha 🤣
Such a great reminder, and such an easy trap for us to get sucked into here in cyberspace. Thanks for expressing it so well ❤
It’s a reminder I need all the time😬😬😬
Wise.
Thanks for the reminder!
I posted it because I needed it too!
I also was told I needed a social media following. I don't because I decided that I wanted to self publish and my writing is really acting as a healing for me. And...the serotonin boost is addictive. I find it working against my goals. So I try to put the phone down and breathe and remind myself that what will be will be.
Yes, this exactly. I am finding the same thing. If I can't find a publisher, so be it.
❤️
That’s really true!!
Thank you for writing your article. I think it is so easy to move to what will make money that as a therapist i forget to write from a passion. your article is a great reminder.
Thank you so much. And thank you for being here, you are a perfect reminder why I am really here.
This is the kind of confession that deserves both a standing ovation and a group hug from everyone still refreshing their Substack stats like it’s the NASDAQ. You didn’t just stop chasing numbers; you tackled the algorithm, looked it in the eye, and said, “Not today, robot overlord.”
It’s funny, isn’t it? Substack was supposed to be a cozy little writer’s campfire, but somehow we all turned it into an episode of Shark Tank. We came here to tell stories, then started pitching ourselves to the algorithm like it’s a moody executive with commitment issues.
Your piece slices through that madness. You remind us that dopamine is cheap, but connection is the good stuff. That hit when a stranger says, “I thought I was the only one”—that’s better than any spike in followers.
You called out the mask, the performance, the desperate need to be seen, and you did it with honesty instead of apology. That’s rare. And ending with curiosity instead of clickbait? That’s practically revolutionary.
So here’s to you: the first writer to admit the numbers were never the story. May your metrics fall and your meaning rise. The algorithm can count engagement, but it will never understand grace, sarcasm, or the human heart.
Thank you for this, and for being one of the people who reminds me regularly why I'm here and what matters.
You matter, friend!
I concur 110% I joined to publish here as the spirit moves me. I've always trusted the universe to be my algorithm - ie as a therapist, let the "good fits" find me. Let the folks who resonate w/my words du jour be in the roulette roll. I've also started looking at some of the "numbers chasers" guides, just to see what they suggest. I don't want to be a mouse in the maze of calculated moves. I start the day looking to see what The Therapist has to say, and, that's because of what she has to say, and she also notices and responds in kind!! Now I click the share to Notes - having no idea what that means, but ideally someone somewhere gains somehow.
Georgina, I am so glad you are here with me. Every time you write a response, you make me think about and beyond my own words.
Please come to Albuquerque when you do a Memoire signing tour!!!
It's hard not to care about metrics when you come here for a purpose. I get that. And decreasing numbers are discouraging. I get that too.
Having only discovered your writing in recent months, I find it so honest and real. I'm glad we've connected.
Thank you for this, I'm so glad we've connected too. I've been a fan of your work for a while now:)
Isn’t it strange that no matter how ‘successful’ we are, we always seem to want just that little bit more. And then we beat ourselves up for being caught in the dopamine trap. It’s very human. But I also have to remind myself that some connection — or having some hope of connection — really is better than nothing. I’m always grateful for my tiny thimble of followers (I might have only 5 reads of a note!) and for having the opportunity of getting a few of my thoughts in my Substack ‘scrapbook’, it’s what I enjoy and that’s what matters. Ive enjoyed reading your reflections too, so thank you for sharing your honesty… it’s a really brave thing to do.😍
This is absolutely my experience and I'm grateful to be in it with people like you. That is what makes it worthwhile.
This is so true and I totally relate to it. Trying to work out the algorithm stymies creativity and intuition. Writing become stilted with an absence of our energies. Such an important and painful lesson to become aware of. Thank you for such honesty.
I'm so glad this landed somewhere gentle. I hate that I get caught up in it, but I also find it hard not to. It never serves me though.
It is so easy to. It is validation for who I am and what I write which I didn’t get as a child. So I am making up for it now. And no, it doesn’t serve us at all.
It's so easy for all of us to get off track by the shinny object or the outside validation. Insight and growth are what builds our confidence and peace. No addictive dopamine hit needed. Isn't that just so cool!
This is a perfect reframe!
100%! Standing up cheering for the honesty instead of chasing numbers! Well done.
Thank you, Friend. The truth is though I forget all the time. But I'm working on it every day.
“that the algorithm that matters isn’t about visibility at all. It’s about vulnerability and connection.”
I am a big fan of your writing and love this take. Thank you for being here and for sharing your words.
Thank you for this. Love being in this community with you.
Thank you for expressing something that has been needling me as well. In this age of having to “optimize” everything it feels especially yucky to optimize our hearts and souls. Appreciated this discussion. And have really been enjoying your work.
I think you framed that exactly as I am feeling it. And thank you for this.